This has been the first weekend in a month that I've had to do whatever I want (or play catch-up on my copious amounts of school work). I've been in a show since December, so my schedule until this point has been booked with rehearsals and performances. But it seems like I have started paying my dues because this time...I was the star of the show.
I started writing about my love for theatre about a year ago, while I was preparing for my first audition in two years. It was a tremendous flop. Since then, though, I've started developing my talents, brushing off the dust of what I thought was possibly lost for ever, and - most importantly - believing in myself. In a year I've been in three musicals, and I just recently was cast in a fourth. And this time, I'm getting paid. I get a paycheck for spending three hours a day playing make believe with some of my favorite people. Nothing is better than that.
Yes, things are looking up for me, despite the fact that I'm still in law school. I even landed a job doing that too (and, perhaps unfortunately, the pay is substantially better than what I'll be making on stage this summer). It's not too bad, though. The people are nice, and I'm realizing that I learn more in class than I thought. As long as I don't get sucked into the lifestyle of spending 70 hours a week surrounded by papers, files, and computers, I think I'll survive.
My theatre experiences in the last 12 months have led me to realize one big thing - I am never, ever giving this up. Every night during my most recent show, I waited behind the curtain as the house manager made announcements about the upcoming performances, my heart pounding in my chest and my blood rushing through my veins. Nothing made me feel more alive than those few moments after the stage manager announced, "Places, please." And I imagine...nothing ever will.
And that is okay.
Recently I've had to deal with a constant push and pull from people in my life. Some tell me, "You can still do this and have a real job." "This is just a hobby; why do you take it so seriously?" "Doesn't all this play stuff get in the way of your studies?" Others say, "Whatever you do, don't stop singing and acting." "You belong up there on that stage." "I'm proud of you for pursuing what you love." "What you really want is to be an actor..."
I'll choose to listen to the others.
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